The Reality of Relationships

Julie Zook

Mrs. Burnett

12 AP English

26 January 2012

The Reality of Relationships

            One of the Socratic Seminar questions for A Thousand Splendid Suns is about the relationships between the characters.  Question ten shows the differences between being protective and being possessive.  Being protective helps make a good relationship because it means that the couple cares about each other and would do anything in order to help out and defend that person.  However, if a person is too protective then they eventually become possessive.  The relationship goes wrong if a partner is putting many limitations on the other person just because they are afraid they might meet someone else.  In the novel, Rasheed is very protective over women.  Before his marriage begins, he courts girls and acts nice but it is just for show.  When they are wed, he sets new rules on the girls that take away their freedoms.  The women have to do chores around the house and have to wear a burqa whether they like it or not.  Rasheed makes the women hide in that clothing so other men are not able to see them.  He does not allow his wives to go out unless he is with them.  On the other hand, Tariq protects Laila as much as he can.  He fought a bully for her so she would never be bothered by him again.  When the war became extremely bad, Tarqi wanted to buy a gun in order to protect her from harm.  In the real world, relationships can be just like the ones the characters are going through.  Some guys protect by serving in the military and fighting for a bully.  Also, they hold a girl’s hand if there is ice on the ground so she won’t fall.  Other guys make up their own rules in order to limit the number of people a girl sees.  They are so anxious about someone cheating on them that they will try to stop that problem by being possessive about it.  The girl would not be allowed to talk to other guys and the guy would go through text messages to make sure that nothing is happening between anyone else.  I think that people would be able to have strong relationships if they are somewhere in between being protective and possessed.  The partner needs to know that there is someone that is going to protect her and help her out if there is any trouble.  However, some people do cheat on others in many different ways but the partner usually finds out about it.  If they can’t trust each other then the relationship is over.